For generations the women of Israel had expectations of the coming King. People thought Messiah would come and destroy wrong and bring peace. He did, but not in the way they thought He would! They needed their expectations adjusted. It all began with the women of Christmas…
Key Principle: Adjusting our expectations to put them in line with God’s plan is a vital part of maturity.
Lesson One. Elizabeth:
My expectations set up disappointment and impatience with God’s Will. Yet God may hold back saying YES to grow YOU past your expectations and prepare to use you in a way far more important than you imagine. How did Elizabeth let God adjust her expectations:
She stood on a platform to be used by God:
• She was from a Levitical family (Lk. 1:5) – the family background gave her balance and positive experiences of maturity to draw from.
• She was personally walking uprightly before God (Lk. 1:6) – her choice to live the values she was trained in, and follow the Lord from within offered her the strength of a deep personal faith to draw from.
• She was barren and beyond the point of expecting a child (Lk. 1:7); Her barren womb was interpreted as a personal disgrace by her (Lk. 1:25) – her troubles and prolonged personal pain gave her a depth of relationship with God to draw from.
One of the ancient kings of Persia loved to mingle with his people in disguise. Once, dressed as a poor man, he descended the long flight of stairs, dark and damp to the tiny cellar where the fireman, seated on ashes, was tending the furnace. The king sat down beside him and began to talk. At meal time the fireman produced some coarse black bread and a jug of water and they ate and drank. The king went away but returned again and again for his heart was filled with sympathy for the lonely man. They became very good friends as time passed. At last the king thought, “I’ll tell him who I am, and see what gift he will ask.” So he did, but the fireman didn’t ask for a thing. The king was astonished and said, “Don’t you realize that I can give you anything—a city, a throne?” The man gently replied, “I understand your Majesty. You have already given the greatest gift a man could receive. You left your palace to sit with me here in this dark and lonely place. You could give nothing more precious. You have given yourself and that is far more than I could ever deserve.”
She functioned even when her heart was wounded:
• She prepared with her husband for his temple service, as required by Law (Lk. 1:6 note: blameless (am’-emp-tos) in respect to the Law) – this helped prepare HIM to do right.
• She received her husband home and believed the angel’s message (Lk. 1:59-60)– this helped her to understand GOD’S purpose.
• She secluded herself for five months of her pregnancy and rejoiced in God’s work in her (Lk. 1:25) – this helped her prepare for the coming ministry God was about to do through her.
God waits in order to display His glory, to dispense His grace and to grow our character. I like how one author puts it.
• When we pray a prayer that is not right, God will say, “NO.”
• When we pray a prayer and we are not right, God will say, “GROW.”
• When we pray a prayer and the timing is not right, God will say, “SLOW.”
• But, when we pray a prayer and all is right, God will say, “GO.” – Pastor Brian Bill, Illinois
She took the lessons she learned and shared them: Here was Elizabeth’s finest hour. She was used of God to explain the nature of the “unexpected God”. Mary came for reassurance, and she got it from a lady who forged a deep relationship through painful times with her Lord over a long experience of delays to her prayer.
• When Mary came to visit her six months into her pregnancy, she was yielded to the Lord and empowered (eplēsthē: furnished), to offer rejoicing (Lk. 1:41). Letting the Spirit dominate took preparation and choice.
• She grasped what the Lord was doing in Mary and aided the younger woman in coming to grips with what God was doing (Lk. 1:42-45). Learning from God’s lesson took insight and depth of relationship.
“You are familiar with Albrecht Durer’s famous painting “The Praying Hands,” but do you know the story behind it? The painting was inspired by the sacrificial, loving acts of a friend. Durer and an older friend were struggling to make a go as artists. Recognizing Durer’s talent, the older man took a job to provide for both of them until Durer could complete his art studies. The work was labor, but he did it gladly for his friend. Finally, Durer made a sale. The money was enough to care for both of them for several months. Now his older friend could resume his painting, but the older man’s hands had become so stiff from the hard labor that he was unable to paint. One day when Durer returned home, he found his friend in prayer, his work-worn hands folded reverently. Durer painted a picture of these hands, capturing them for ages to come as a memorial to the love and sacrifice of his older friend.” (Frank Morgan, Jr. Keys To Unlock Yourself. Nashville : Braodman Press, 1985, pp. 75-76).
She stood up for truth, even when she lacked support around her:
• She remained obedient to the wor
ds of the angel on behalf of her husband’s inability to speak, even when others around her disagreed (Lk. 1:61-62). When the covering was weak, her choices were firm!
She became part of the wave of testimony of God’s new work!
• She shared the blessing and rejoiced with all who knew her (Lk. 1:57).
• She testified of God’s gracious work (Yohanon is short form of Yeho -chanan “God is gracious”). in the child in a memorable way to all who would hear (Lk. 1:66).
“Roland Allen tells about a veteran missionary who came up to him one day after he had delivered his sermon. The missionary introduced himself & said, “I was a medical missionary for many years in India. And I served in a region where there was progressive blindness. People were born with healthy vision, but there was something in that area that caused people to lose their sight as they matured.” “But this missionary had developed a process which would [stop the] progressive blindness. So people came to him & he performed his operation, & they would leave realizing that they would have become blind, but now they were going to be able to see for the rest of their lives. “He said that they never said, “Thank you,” because that phrase was not in their dialect. Instead, they spoke a word that meant, “I will tell your name.” Wherever they went, they would tell the name of the missionary who had cured their blindness. They had received something so wonderful that they eagerly proclaimed it….”– Melvin Newland
Lesson Two. The Mothers of Bethlehem:
My expectations set me up to dictate to God what should come in to my life – placing my will ahead of His. God may not hold back the tragedy of the enemy’s wickedness. We must shed any expectation beyond bringing Him pleasure in our own responses to the unexpected.
Matthew 1:16 Then when Herod saw that he had been tricked by the magi, he became very enraged, and sent and slew all the male children who were in Bethlehem and all its vicinity, from two years old and under, according to the time which he had determined from the magi. 17 Then what had been spoken through Jeremiah the prophet was fulfilled: 18 “A VOICE WAS HEARD IN RAMAH, WEEPING AND GREAT MOURNING, RACHEL WEEPING FOR HER CHILDREN; AND SHE REFUSED TO BE COMFORTED, BECAUSE THEY WERE NO MORE.”
• Herod’s lie was uncovered by God both to Joseph and the Magi, but that did not spare the children of Bethlehem or their mothers from tragedy. God did not reveal the truth of the coming danger to the other families.
• Jeremiah’s prophecy of the New Covenant to Israel was brought in on the pain and suffering of the people who hardened themselves against God’s direction (Jeremiah 31).
Lesson Three. Mary, Mother of Jesus:
My expectations must be ever fluid as I follow the path – not of my dreams – but of God’s direction!
• Reality and expectations often don’t match:
Luke 2:7: “And she gave birth to her firstborn son; and she wrapped Him in cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn…”
Your expectation may be to have a fairytale time, but you must do the best you can with what you have! You can’t give them everything you want to give them – but provide what they most need. In the earliest event between Jesus and His mother, she is meeting His basic provisional needs of clothing and warmth. She sought the best place she could (she settled for what she could provide). Be careful – when you lead with your heart you can also try to give them more than they should have. There is always a balance.
• Parenting is a process of ever adjusting expectations:
Luke 2:17-19 “When they (the shepherds) had seen this, they made known the statement which had been told them about this Child. 18 And all who heard it wondered at the things which were told them by the shepherds. 19 But Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart.”
Later that same night, the shepherds told her of a great future for her child. She delighted and dreamed of a future for her child! Dream for your child. Delight in every step of learning and cheer them into being what God intended them to be! Mothering is not an act of biology, it is a dynamic relationship. It is forged in DREAMS. Yet, we must be careful. Our dreams must be fluid for we can build our own expectations and resentments by placing our dreams ahead of God’s direction.
• Even the main things I define my life by are NOT MINE, but God’s!
“My children” are not “my children”. Eight days after His birth, Mary and Joseph were offering a sacrifice for the child and naming the baby in accordance to the angelic command at the time of the conception. Israel redeemed their first born child as the Law stated (Lev. 12:6). We all need reminders they aren’t “our” doing, and they don’t truly belong to us!
• Luke 2:21-24: “And when eight days had passed, before His circumcision, His name was then called Jesus, the name given by the angel before He was conceived in the womb. 22 And when the days for their purification according to the law of Moses were completed, they brought Him up to Jerusalem to present Him to the Lord 23 (as it is written in the Law of the Lord, “EVERY firstborn MALE THAT OPENS THE WOMB SHALL BE CALLED HOLY TO THE LORD”), 24 and to offer a sacrifice according to what was said in the Law of the Lord, “A PAIR OF TURTLEDOVES OR TWO YOUNG PIGEONS.”
• Luke 2:34-35: “And Simeon blessed them and said to Mary His mother, “Behold, this Child is appointed for the fall and rise of many in Israel, and for a sign to be opposed—35 and a sword will pierce even your own soul–to the end that thoughts from many hearts may be revealed.”
We live and die a thousand times in the excitement and pain of our children as they live – we face the heart break of every disappointment or trouble they will suffer in their future. The truth is that hard times will come for our child, and we must prepare the child, but we must also prepare ourselves! Happy is the woman who has built a great relationship with an unfailing God in the good years.
Lesson Four. Anna:
God may call upon you to reset your personal expectations in a “Plan B”. In some ways Anna had something in common with Elizabeth ng>.
Luke 2:36 “And there was a prophetess, Anna (shortened: Channah, or “Grace”) the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was advanced in years and had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, 37 and then as a widow to the age of eighty-four. She never left the temple, serving night and day with fastings and prayers. 38 At that very moment she came up and began giving thanks to God, and continued to speak of Him to all those who were looking for the redemption of Jerusalem.”
Anna understood by a long life of faithfulness the words Jeremiah spoke to Israel long before: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.” — Jeremiah 29:11-12
• Anna learned CURBED EXPECTATIONS!
Anna was very old by the time we are introduced to her in the Word. She was widowed after a marriage that lasted only a brief seven years. Now eighty-four years old, Anna learned patience and dependence upon God. She fasted and prayed day and night, never leaving the Temple.
2:36a “And there was a prophetess, Anna (shortened: Channah, or “Grace”) the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher.
Anna was not like most women of her time. She chose a different path. Instead of finding her identity in a second marriage and raising children – she heard God’s direction and went a different way then people expected. She chose to serve the Lord. Her expectations, probably the same as other women of her day, were dramatically altered by God’s superintending in her life.
She learned to move through the terrible pain of losing her husband, relying on God to financially and emotionally meet the needs of her life.
2:36b-7 “She was advanced in years and had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, and then as a widow to the age of eighty-four. She never left the temple, serving night and day with fasting and prayers.”
• When she curbed her expectations to total reliance on God – she stuck with it!
The people who have encouraged me the most were the people who over the long haul of life have learned to drink from the well of satisfaction from the Lord even when their life circumstances were not ideal. Sixty-five years of waiting is incredible patience to wait for anything – much less a baby to mark the redemption. God is in no hurry! We will not experience instant depth, instant passion, instant deep praise. Genuine change of heart takes time. Genuine weaning of self satisfaction to God’s purposes requires time and a painful transition as I leave the throne of my heart and He takes it.
• When she curbed her expectations – she sought the Lord and did what He instructed!
What if Anna decided not to come in on Tuesdays because she was feeling lazy? What if she accommodated her feelings of disobedience and thought: I don’t feel like looking for the Messiah this morning – I will go in latert? The blessings of being obedient far outweigh the temporary satisfaction of placating my wants and desires.
Luke 2:38 At that very moment she came up and began giving thanks to God, and continued to speak of Him to all those who were looking for the redemption of Jerusalem.”
• She learned reliance of God meant real strength and real provision!
Others are defined by their roles – Anna’s role was stripped from her and THEN God defined her real purpose. God used her in spite of being the definition of poor and hopeless. She was not forsaken, she was being set up to accomplish her life’s purpose!
“Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me. The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever – do not abandon the works of your hands.” — Psalm 138:7-9
“My steps have held to your paths; my feet have not slipped. I call on you, O God, for you will answer me; give ear to me and hear my prayer.” – Psalm 17:5-6
Adjusting our expectations to put them in line with God’s plan is a vital part of maturity.
